A little girl that had fallen
A boy that had dropped their ice cream
Me, pushing in the queue in front of someone at the sweet shop
It could have been any of the above situations, where my mum would say,
‘Kirsty, how would you feel if that was happening to you?’
Ever the teacher, Mum always asked me to think about other’s feelings in her hope that it would change my actions that followed.
I never knew at that young age that I was learning the skills of sympathy and empathy. I also never knew just how important those skills would be today. Right now. That having the instincts to truly place myself in someone else’s shoes would be so important.
Many clients are asking me and my colleagues, ‘When is the right time to sell?’
Practicing the skills I learned many years ago, I try to understand how these organisations and people are feeling right now to have to ask that question and consider, what are they really asking us?
‘When do you think this will be over?’
‘When can I minimise risk and make some money?’
‘What’s the best way to stay afloat whilst being sensitive to the current situation?’
‘When can I take action to help my situation and others?’
‘Are you still selling to customers?’
Whilst trying my best to answer this question I always refer to Principle # 17 from Dale Carnegie’s Golden Book, which is principle ‘Try honestly to see things from other people’s point of view’.
Taken from the top selling business book ‘ How to Win Friends and Influence People’, the Secrets to Success/ Golden Book is used by many business leaders and organisations who utilise the key tips, tools and principles to help shape their behaviours and work.
So, try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view – sounds easy right?
Easy until we realise at the age of 5 we have to queue for sweeties. Easy until we’re running a business and experience unexpected change, easy until we want to sell and feel like we can’t, easy until we have supply chain headaches, cash flow issues, people problems and pandemics.
We know at Dale Carnegie that process is one of the drivers for performance and behaviour change.
Here is a quick win tool that will help people to practice #17 and look at creating some opportunities to connect, using the VIEW Process explained below.
Visualise yourself in their position – Really try to picture how you would feel and react in their situation.
Include and Understand – Work with your network and team to strengthen the ability to really understand things from others point of view.
Empathise and Connect – Show people we care and offer a connection, maybe an online chat.
What’s Important? – Many of our clients tell us that solution and relationship selling are far more impactful. Finding out what your clients/teams needs are and offering support is a stepping stone to that solution sale. Allowing people to buy.
Maybe you are a business owner being sold to, maybe you are a salesperson securing future relationships, maybe you are selling an idea internally to your manager.
Whichever way, it could be worth considering the importance of #17, showing some sympathy and empathy, giving some of your time and asking ourselves,
‘What’s the price we all pay if everyone stops selling?’
You can download the Golden Book for free, accessing the timeless principles from ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ and another fabulous book, ‘How to Stop Worrying and Start Living.’
Another great resource on building relationships with clients is ‘ Why Long-Term Customer Loyalty is Still Driven by Trusted Relationships.’ Click here to download it.
Kirsty Tagg is a Relationship Manager and Trainer for Dale Carnegie Northern England. Excelling in building rapport and client relationships she works with a variety of companies adding value to their sales people, enabling them to improve their success in their sales role business objectives. As a trainer, Kirsty specialises in developing people to transform themselves and their performance at work.